Will the next CS Lewis be lost to video games and porn?
Belmeida de Almeiro, Arrufos
In today’s post:
1. Love and work
2. The counterfeit
3. The Coolidge Effect- why porn turns violent
4. Your brain out of shape- your perceptions are warped
5. Your unique gifting
6. CS Lewis’ example
7. Offensive and defensive strategies
More regular updates? We’re new to Twitter, help grow our network https://twitter.com/StreetTheologn
Or try Substack:
https://streettheologian.substack.com/
“In these days of exceptional evil, are you doing something exceptional? Or are you just content with doing some routine things?” — Martin Lloyd Jones as quoted by Ray Ortlund in The Death of Porn
“How do we get to the end of our lives with minimal regrets? We choose well. We set aside lesser pursuits to seek meaning in our lives. And we do it every single day.” — Joshua Becker
Disclaimer
This article, though targeted mainly at Christians (non-Christians may find it just as helpful!), is not intended to be a spiritual beat-up session. All of us have wasted countless hours of our lives on meaningless and, even, dangerous pursuits.
I’m not a doctor, I’m not a scientist, I’m not a theologian either for that matter (that’s why I’m called Street Theologian). Take the views in this article as opinions only and seek professional advice.
Gifts, God and Godliness
We don’t have any gifts from God which we did not receive, all are given to us (1 Cor 4.7). God cleanses and purifies us (John 15:3, 2 Peter 1:4,9), we are incapable of it ourselves. God has gifted us what we need for “life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence (2 Peter 1:3)”.
The fight of fake vs real
Let’s not settle for cheap counterfeits which dig a grave for our own destruction. We are all called, as individuals, yet in a team, as fellow Christians to live according to the calling which we have been called (2 Peter 1:10).
Doc Goldenberg
The battle is fierce. The struggles in life are real for each and every one of us. Let’s look beyond ourselves as a team to a great cause and serious threat. Worthwhile pursuits don’t come easy.
Henry Detmold
Love and work
In our previous article, we discussed Sigmund Freud’s view on religious belief as a crutch for the weak, based on a fantastical father figure.
Freud also famously claimed, “Love and work are the cornerstones of our humanness (as quoted in Erikson 1963, pp.264–65; Elms 2001).”
Love and work for the Christian
Love and work are also central to Christian living. Christ loved us while we were still sinners (Rom. 5:8). Whoever loves God is known by him (1 Cor. 8:3). Christ’s followers abide in his love (John 15:9), loving God and others around them (John 13:34, 1 John 3:23). While still living as imperfect humans, this love forms the basis of true work- Spirit empowered, Christ-centred pursuits which serve others and glorify God (Gal. 5:22–23, Eph. 2:10, James 2:26, 2 Peter 1:5–9).
What do love and work include?
Love obviously can include romantic relationships but also love to family, friends, enemies, fellow believers and, ultimately, God. Work can include employment with a Christian attitude but also the growth of character, endurance through trials, evangelising others, using gifts to serve and build up others and so forth.
The Rejected Offer- Jan van Biljert
Counterfeit love and work
In apologetics circles, we often focus on external threats to Christianity in the form of other worldviews or arguments against Christianity. Little focus is often given to the internal threats which plague us all.
Responding to sceptics involves more than just being ready to give a defense (1 Peter 3:15–16). Honouring Christ in our hearts (v.15), operating with gentleness and respect (v.15) and acting in good conscience are also requirements outlined in 1 Peter 3:15–16. Porn and video game addictions work against this.
The stats
Excessive use of pornography and also (though to a lesser extent) video games is prevalent in church circles today. A 2019 Freedom Fight survey of over 1300 Practising Christian college students, surveyed students from other thirty different campuses who were involved in a campus ministry. Many of the students surveyed were leaders in their ministries.
The results were alarming, “Porn use sometimes seems almost as common as drinking water.. This perception is rooted in reality.. 89% of the growing Christian men we surveyed watch porn, at least occasionally. 61% view it at least weekly and 24% watch porn daily or multiple times a day. 51% of these men said they are addicted to porn.”
The study outlined that women can also be plagued by excessive pornography use.
Pathways Program
Idolatry
Porn use is idolatry (Col. 3:5). You are bowing to the dark gods and goddesses of porn instead of serving King Jesus. You are siding with the enemy.
Pornography and video games strike right at the heart of what true love and work look like. Pornography is a counterfeit of sacrificial love. Rather than trying to build another person up, it is a self-indulgent act devoid of commitment.
The trick
Video games trick the brain into thinking a problem is being solved or progress in life is being made. Can video games be used healthily and in moderation? Yes. However, bear in mind, games are made to be addictive. Don’t forget your priorities. Games tap right into the reward centre of the brain and lead to a dopamine release. You think you’re building, eliminating enemy threats, making progress, gaining assets, learning meaningful skills but it is all in an addictive fantasy land.
In this article, we will primarily focus on porn use due to moral concerns and widespread use.
Integrated Men’s Health
The Coolidge Effect- why porn turns violent
In a marriage context, sexual intercourse is about serving the other person and vice versa (1 Cor. 7:3–4). Porn creates a super-normal situation- novelty. The Coolidge effect, refers to tests performed on animals whereby males progressively lose interest in mating with the same female yet experience a heightened sexual interest in new females.
Porn tricks the mind into thinking the user has encountered a new sexual partner while engaging with them in a super-normal fantastical way (hence, the popularity of violent porn). Consequently, the mind is able to bathe in dopamine for hours, far beyond what is normal when two humans are having intercourse.
Utah Valley Psychology illustrates, pornography can offer much more sustained increases of dopamine than sex over a 5-hour period with dopamine still over 250% above normal levels after 3 hours of porn compared to just over 150% for sex.
Reward Foundation
New body types, different age brackets, new nationalities, new sexual activities, more violent sexual activities. The bottomless pit of porn use unfolds. A hungry beast that is never satisfied.
It is no wonder the most popular porn videos are violent. A study of 304 best-selling porn scenes found: Of the 304 scenes analyzed, 88.2% contained physical aggression, principally spanking, gagging, and slapping, while 48.7% of scenes contained verbal aggression, primarily name-calling.
Your brain “goes out of shape”- your perceptions are warped
Researchers have found similarities between the brains of heroin and porn users- Guardian
Researchers have compared the brains of porn users to that of heroin users and noticed similarities. Moreover, porn can alter sexual tastes. Studies have also compared the impact of porn use and internet gaming on the brain to the use of substance drugs, noting some similarities and differences.
Withdrawal symptoms
It is no wonder those trying to quit porn can report withdrawal symptoms. Headaches, dizziness, shaking, paralysing urges and inability to sleep. The brain is changing shape due to the property of neuroplasticity. The pain can be good, part of the process of rewiring the brain. Enduring the pain can deliver great progress.
Furthermore, it is no surprise those trying to quit porn can report their brains trying to throw every excuse possible at them to fall back into their old habits. Sexual fantasies about everyone they see, excuses they’ve had a hard day at work and need a rest, excuses they’ve been rejected and have no other way to respond, excuses that everyone is addicted and it is fine for them to be. On and on it goes.
Image Courtesy of Lawrence V. Tucker, M.D., PLLC, Diplomate, American Board of Psychiatry & Neurology and Appearing in the Conquer Series
It is no wonder, many people can take years to get past this stage and get to a position where they are not constantly overwhelmed or tempted by sexual or lustful thoughts. Nonetheless, Dr. Kevin Skinner says most major withdrawal symptoms last only two to eight weeks (Treating Pornography Addiction, 41). Change can start today.
How does this impact your gifts?
As demonstrated above, addictive behaviours such as porn and video games shape your brain. Your brain can experience rewards for watching other people having sexual intercourse and for moving up the ranks in a fantasy land. Naturally, this takes time and attention away from love and work. Pursuits that should be rewarding appear less rewarding compared to video games and porn.
Consequently, consistent effort and cultivation of gifts become less and less likely. Instead of reading deep books or having deep philosophical thoughts, someone who has an intellectual gifting, like Lewis, could easily have their mind filled with unproductive and harmful lustful fantasies instead.
Anker DG
Your gifting
What is your gifting? What do others say you are good at? What is a change you want to make? What do you enjoy working on that doesn’t really feel like work? Focus on this instead of video games and porn.
Few people are as intellectually gifted as CS Lewis, yet many of you have gifted minds which through reading, thinking and learning to communicate you can use to defend Christianity and build up the body of Christ.
Others are highly gifted with interpersonal skills, others have musical talents, others are gifted communicators, and others highly skilled in business and administration. God even gifted people with skills of the artisan, embroider, designer and weaver in setting up the tabernacle (Ex. 35:35–36:1)! The list truly goes on. Are you cultivating these gifts? Where is your attention going?
Attention is a moral act: it creates, brings aspects of things into being, but in doing so makes others recede. — Iain McGilchrist
CS Lewis’ example
Lust is weak, love conquers lust
Lust is a poor, weak, whimpering, whispering thing compared with that richness and energy of desire which will arise when lust has been killed. Love is the great conqueror of lust. Gratitude looks to the Past and love to the Present; fear, avarice, lust, and ambition look ahead. — CS Lewis, Great Divorce
Lustful men want pleasure not women
We use a most unfortunate idiom when we say, of a lustful man prowling the streets, that he “wants a woman.” Strictly speaking, a woman is just what he does not want. He wants a pleasure for which a woman happens to be the necessary piece of apparatus. — The Four Loves
Masturbation makes you delusional, loving yourself in dreamland (aka mental prison) with fake brides
For me the real evil of masturbation.. sends the man back into the prison of himself, there to keep a harem of imaginary brides… the harem is always accessible, always subservient, calls for no sacrifices or adjustments, and can be endowed with erotic and psychological attractions which no woman can rival. Among those shadowy brides he is always adored, always the perfect lover.. they become merely the medium through which he increasingly adores himself.. Masturbation is to be avoided as all things are to be avoided which retard this process. The danger is that of coming to love the prison. — Personal Letter From Lewis to Keith Masson (found in The Collected Letters of C.S. Lewis, Volume 3)
Lewis’ life
Lewis was single much of his life, only getting married in his late 50s to Joy Davidman who sadly died of cancer four years later. As a prolific writer and academic, Lewis surely was an example of the richness and energy of desire which can result when meaningful pursuits are prioritised above lower desires.
Despite many worldview differences, there is an interesting similarity between Freud and Lewis. From around age 40 until his death (at 83), Sigmund Freud was absolutely celibate “in order to sublimate the libido for creative purposes,” according to his biographer Ernest Jones.
At what cost?
At what cost will we betray our values and give in? What level of suffering is enough to try and numb the pain temporarily by giving in? A death in the family? A bad diagnosis? Betrayal? A rejection? A job loss? A divorce or break up? An off day at work? Family issues? A recent failure driving us to shame rather than going to Christ? Where does our foundation in suffering actually lie? In Christ’s suffering for us.
Offensive and defensive strategies- both a spiritual and physical reality
Strategy in chess, John Lavery
Offensive strategies
In beating addictive behaviours both offensive and defensive strategies can be helpful. It is crucial to note the battle is both spiritual and physical. Offensive strategies tend to be focused on godly character, routine, fostering discipline, closeness to God and service to others, ultimately replacing lust with love.
Offensive strategies include:
- relational closeness to and delight in God through his Word and prayer (eg. Psalm 16:11, I’d highly recommend the Life of God in the Soul of Man by Henry Scougal)
- openly admitting the dark state of your heart to God in prayer (being as specific as possible) while asking he changes it
- meditating on Christ’s work
- healthy friendships and community
- using your gifts to work hard at things you are passionate about and serve others (replace a bad habit with a good one)
- resolving to act a certain way irrespective of the turmoils of life (what you can control v what you can’t)
- fostering spiritual discipline through fasting
- embracing physical discomfort daily (eg. team sports, muscular endurance exercises, ice or cold water exposure etc), eating well and getting enough sleep.
Defensive strategies
Defensive strategies tend to be more of an emergency response.
Defensive strategies can include:
- observing triggers (eg. HALT- are you hungry, angry, lonely or tired when tempted? what pain are you numbing yourself to?)
- prayer and Scripture (in response to temptation rather than through routine)
- dopamine management through the use of physical exercise and cold water exposure
- starving the animal of lust while it is hungry while viewing the pain as progress etc
- knowing urges are temporary and understanding benefits which stem from resisting
And much more!
The way forward
Ultimately ask yourself why you are doing what you do. What is meaningful to do? Are you content throwing your life away to internet heroin? The task before us is great. Yet, we have everything we need for life and godliness (2 Peter 1:3). Christ’s love has done the work for you on the cross, what you’re doing now is saying thanks- through love and work as he empowers you.
No human is a means to an end — Viktor Frankl, Man’s Search for Ultimate Meaning
Why doesn’t God help me stop committing this sin?
Did Jesus rise from the dead? Your comprehensive 2023 Guide
Quoting Ehrman: 20 Bart Ehrman quotes every NON-CHRISTIAN should know
streettheologian@protonmail.com
More regular updates? https://twitter.com/StreetTheologn
